Photo credit: Willamette Week – Portland’s Strip Club Haunted House will return for the third year in a row

Portland loves nudity. We have the annual World Naked Bike Ride. Oregon has laws permitting public nudity. Appropriately, we have the most strip clubs per capita (we have twice as many strip clubs as we have public bathrooms!).

Heck, we almost have the most strip clubs of any city in the entire country (what’s going on in Houston, anyway?). We even have themed strip clubs. Casa Diablo is the world’s first vegan strip club. Spyce Gentlemen’s Club just announced that Portland’s Strip Club Haunted House is returning for its second sequel (its third year running).

According to a 2015 study (they do studies of these things???) Portland had 54 strip clubs at the time – that’s 8.86 strip clubs for every 1,000 Stumptowners – making Portland #1 in the United States for strip clubs per capita. Let’s put that in perspective – Portland has more strip clubs and significantly more per capita than Las Vegas, the Den of Sin and the capital for all that’s unholy on the planet.

This is all fine and dandy, but it does bring up the question – why does Portland have so many strip clubs?SPANX

Turns out, Priceonomics did the research and you can start stripping away the mystery by simply looking at Oregon’s state constitution in Article 1, Section 8: “No law shall be passed restraining the free expression of opinion, or restricting the right to speak, write or print freely on any subject whatsoever.” That free expression has been bared in Oregon’s Supreme Court which has always offered the right support to our stripping population.

Additional laws around Oregon assisted our lovely dancers in keeping their clothes off, specifically stating that Oregon cities cannot zone adult businesses differently from other businesses. Want to set up an adult bookstore next to a daycare? Have at it. (We’re actually surprised no one’s thought of combining those two businesses – what could possibly go wrong?!)

Most cities make you keep your clothes on by zoning strip clubs to only industrial zones and requiring they locate a minimum of 1,000 feet from “sensitive-use areas” such as churches and schools. Not so in Stumptown. We’ve got the right to the free expression of our opinion. And our boobies, wing-wangs, and bajingos.

Curious about the Strip Club Haunted House (special thanks to Willamette Week for the image and article featuring it)? This year’s theme is a haunted Playboy Mansion. It runs from Wednesday, October 25, 2017 through Tuesday, October 31, 2017 getting down to business at 9 p.m. daily, nightly, and ever so rightly. Admission is $15, $25 for VIP. Spyce Gentlemen’s Club is located on the corner of NW 2nd Avenue and Couch Street (appropriately enough – “Couch” is pronounced “Cooch” – Urban Dictionary time!) at 33 NW 2nd Ave.

Have at it, Stumptown!

What do you think of Portland’s bountiful supply of bootyful strip clubs? Express yourself in the comments!

References

Source: Why does Portland have so many strip clubs?
Source: Portland’s Strip Club Haunted House will return for the third year in a row



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