There are a lot of issues affecting Portland these days – rising unemployment, an overcrowded I-5 bridge, gang crime and smelly coworkers. Fortunately, the city council has gotten together to solve at least one of these issues – the new fragrance-free policy will grant council employees a reprieve from their colleague, Big Bertha, who wore enough of Paris Hilton’s “Just Me” to suffocate several elephants.

Violators of the policy will be “disciplined.” Add your suitable disciplinary action in the comments below.

Source: Portland council OKs fragrance-free policy

To our knowledge, no one by the name of Bertha works at the council’s office. If there is a Bertha, we apologize – we’re sure you don’t smell like anything at all.